[v23.2.x] Use confirmed term as a source of leader epoch

[vbotbuildovich]

Backport #16560 to branch v23.2.x. Note that this issue was created as a placeholder, since the original PR's commit(s) could not be automatically cherry-picked.
Here are the commands to execute:

git checkout v23.2.x
git checkout -b vbotbuildovich/backport-16560-v23.2.x-511
git cherry-pick -x 6037462dfa080c23df509db0d766d5338eccef21 e746f79bd85a288b378a1dcbcdb6d0c9cf25f853

git push origin vbotbuildovich/backport-16560-v23.2.x-511
gh pr create \
  --title "[v23.2.x] Use confirmed term as a source of leader epoch" \
  --base "v23.2.x" \
  --label "kind/backport" \
  --head "vbotbuildovich/backport-16560-v23.2.x-511" \
  --draft \
  --repo "redpanda-data/redpanda" \
  --milestone "v23.2.x-next" \
  --body "Backport of PR https://github.com/redpanda-data/redpanda/pull/16560 "

[piyushredpanda]

Closing as v23.2.x is going end-of-support