feat: reject promises on connection loss

[sirtimid]

Closes #686

This PR does the following:

• When a remote connection is lost and retries are exhausted, all promises for which that remote is the decider are now rejected, including promises from queued messages that were never delivered.
• Exposes maxRetryAttempts and maxQueue as configurable options for remote communications initialization, converts the relays parameter to an options object for future extensibility.
• Fixes a bug where maxRetryAttempts was not being respected due to resetBackoff being called too early in the reconnection flow.

---

Note

Reject promises when remote connections are abandoned; switch remote comms init to options (relays/maxRetryAttempts/maxQueue) and tighten reconnection/backoff behavior across stack.

• Remote Comms (ocap-kernel):
  • Add remoteGiveUp RPC (kernel-remote) and propagate from server to kernel; RemoteManager rejects pending URL redemptions and all promises decided by the remote on give-up.
  • Change initRemoteComms to accept RemoteCommsOptions (relays, maxRetryAttempts, maxQueue); persist relays; update PlatformServices/types accordingly.
  • Fix reconnection flow: respect maxRetryAttempts, reset backoff only after successful flush, queue flushing merges hints, intentional close handling, wake detector backoff reset; ConnectionFactory accepts maxRetryAttempts.
  • Minor: getPromisesByDecider now uses EndpointId.
• Platform Services:
  • Browser/Node servers and clients updated to new options API; add handling for remoteGiveUp (client callback, server forwards via RPC).
  • Kernel calls remoteManager.cleanup() on stop; worker init uses kernel.initRemoteComms({ relays }).
• Tests/Coverage:
  • Extensive unit/e2e tests added/updated for give-up, options, reconnection, queues, hints; coverage thresholds adjusted.

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[rekmarks]

Looks good! Some questions / comments.

[rekmarks]

LGTM, but see the robot's most recent review.