Can we simplify language and purpose here?

pages/introduction.md

@@ -8,7 +8,7 @@ description: "Introduction"
 
 **Category Management Policy 16-1: Improving the Acquisition and Management of Common Information Technology: Software Licensing**
 
-Each year, the Federal Government spends more than $9 billion on software<sup id="fnr1"><a href="#fn1">1</a></sup> through more than 50,000 transactions, which results in a fragmented and inefficient marketplace. A recent report by the Government Accountability Office (GAO)<sup id="fnr2"><a href="#fn2">2</a></sup> indicates that agencies buy and manage software licenses in a decentralized manner, struggle to create accurate inventories, often purchase unneeded capabilities, and generally do not share pricing, terms, and conditions across Government to facilitate better purchasing. Furthermore, most agencies do not have a designated central oversight authority to manage software agreements, and agency personnel often lack sufficient experience and expertise to effectively negotiate and manage large software agreements. This memorandum addresses these and other challenges in information technology (IT) commodity management, specifically software licensing, in order to help agencies improve the acquisition and management of common IT goods and services. This memorandum follows recent Office of Management and Budget (OMB) guidance regarding new requirements for purchasing desktops and laptops<sup id="fnr3"><a href="#fn3">3</a></sup>.
+Each year the Federal Government spends more than $9 Billion on software<sup id="fnr1"><a href="#fn1">1</a></sup>.  This software is purchased through 50,000 transactions.  Agencies that purchase and manage this software this way struggle to create and maintain accurate inventories, often purchase software they don't need, and do not share pricing, terms and conditions with others in government well <sup id="fnr2"><a href="#fn2">2</a></sup>.  Furthermore most agencies don't have centralized oversight to manage the software agreements, and personnel often don't have the necessary experience to negotiate large agreements with vendors.  To address these and other challenges, this document provides guidance on how to purchase and manage software more effectively, and manage software licenses more responsibly.  
 
 The Federal Information Technology Acquisition Reform Act (FITARA)<sup id="fnr4"><a href="#fn4">4</a></sup> and the Office of Management and Budget's category management initiative<sup id="fnr5"><a href="#fn5">5</a></sup> address a number of IT management challenges by directing agencies to buy and manage common commodities – like commercial software – in a more coordinated way. To fully leverage the Government's vast buying power, improvements must be made at both the agency and the governmentwide level. Agencies need to move to a more centralized management structure so they can reduce underutilization and maximize the use of best-in-class solutions<sup id="fnr6"><a href="#fn6">6</a></sup>. In parallel, governmentwide strategies, such as increasing the number and use of enterprise software agreements and developing better inventory tools, are needed to reduce duplication of efforts.  The success of these governmentwide steps depends on the improvements that agencies make in their own license management programs.