fix Node 20 compatibility

[turadg]

Spawned from Agoric/agoric-sdk#8365 (comment)

I hit my timebox on this for now so just leaving some notes.

make is failing with,

/Users/turadg/Library/Caches/node-gyp/20.9.0/include/node/v8-maybe.h:106:45: error: no template named 'is_lvalue_reference_v' in namespace 'std'; did you mean 'is_lvalue_reference'?
  template <class U, std::enable_if_t<!std::is_lvalue_reference_v<U>>*>
                                       ~~~~~^~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
                                            is_lvalue_reference

electron/electron#35193 has some leads but none have solved it yet.

Maybe Wandalen#53 will solve this before we get back to it.