[DevTools] Track all public HostInstances in a Map

[sebmarkbage]

This lets us get from a HostInstance to the nearest DevToolsInstance without relying on findFiberByHostInstance and fiberToDevToolsInstanceMap. We already did the equivalent of this for Resources in HostHoistables.

One issue before was that we'd ideally get away from the fiberToDevToolsInstanceMap map in general since we should ideally not treat Fibers as stateful but they could be replaced by something else stateful in principle.

This PR also addresses Virtual Instances. Now you can select a DOM node and have it select a Virtual Instance if that's the nearest parent since the parent doesn't have to be a Fiber anymore.

However, the other reason for this change is that I'd like to get rid of the need for the findFiberByHostInstance from being injected. A renderer should not need to store a reference back from its instance to a Fiber. Without the Synthetic Event system this wouldn't be needed by the renderer so we should be able to remove it. We also don't really need it since we have all the information by just walking the commit to collect the nodes if we just maintain our own Map.

There's one subtle nuance that the different renderers do. Typically a HostInstance is the same thing as a PublicInstance in React but technically in Fabric they're not the same. So we need to translate between PublicInstance and HostInstance. I just hardcoded the Fabric implementation of this since it's the only known one that does this but could feature detect other ones too if necessary. On one hand it's more resilient to refactors to not rely on injected helpers and on hand it doesn't follow changes to things like this.

For the conflict resolution I added in #30494 I had to make that specific to DOM so we can move the DOM traversal to the backend instead of the injected helper.

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[sebmarkbage]

This is not really new. I discovered this was already an issue with leaking HostHoistables but it's really a blocker for landing this PR since it leaks DOM nodes if they're filtered which is way more common.

I can address this with a separate PR though which I think will need to start tracking some filtered Fiber Instances in some cases.

[hoxyq]

Could this be fixed by just manually releasing host instance / resource if instance is filtered out?

[sebmarkbage]

Yea I'm just not sure how to structure it yet because we can't just recursively do it because we also recursively walk the Instance tree. I also have another need to track FiberInstances that are filtered to get the HostInstance from a VirtualInstance. So I was going to see where that landed first.

I won't land this until it has a solution though.

[sebmarkbage]

I went with this approach to manually release if they're filtered out:

a4ae4d6

This will work with #30865 because we can start from the filtered fiber instance and then untrack from there.

The shouldFilterFiber function isn't exactly always fast so it's not great to use it like this for every filtered instance if it's slow but in the case where it's just checking a tag it's ok.

[hoxyq]

Could this be fixed by just manually releasing host instance / resource if instance is filtered out?